Failed first dates have destroyed thousands of potential love stories. How can you avoid mistakes and give your relationship a chance? What are the main mistakes we make? Here they are.
1) You forget the first date main rule: you’ll never get a second chance to make a first impression
Many are convinced that any mistakes made on the first date are easily remediable. Maybe you had a bad mood or were awfully dressed. So what? Next time you’ll definitely try harder and look better. The thing is that it’s the first impression that stays in our heads forever and not the second one. Of course, you can eliminate some of the negative aspects, but it’s very, very difficult to change it completely. Moreover, with this attitude towards the first date, you may not even get a second one. So, there won’t be another chance to impress your companion.
2) You talk too much about yourself and your merits
Yes, we all want to seem much better than we are. However, an active self-advertising campaign almost always makes people delete your number and never meet with you again. You should remember two things. First, a good ‘product’ doesn’t need additional advertising. So bragging about your financial status, good job, and so on, you’ll just make your companion think that you’re insincere. Second, people, for the most part, just don’t like those, who have a too high opinion of themselves. Here’s one more thing: this the most important rule to remember when dating a Russian woman.
3) You don’t talk to your companion much and don’t ask any questions
Doing this you demonstrate that you’re completely uninterested in the person. On the other hand, you deprive them of the pleasure to talk about themselves and evaluate how good you are. And this quality is extremely important.
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4) You talk about your past relationship
Perhaps in the future, your companion will ask you about it (however, this doesn’t mean that they need a detailed confession). But talking about it without them asking, especially on the first date, is a fatal mistake. The only exception is if the partner herself tells you about the main stages of her personal life, clearly waiting for the same story from you. But in this case, it’s better not to overdo it with the details and emotions. By the way, if none your previous relationships ended at your own initiative, your new acquaintance should never know about this. Otherwise, she will begin to suspect that there’s something’s wrong with you.
5) You start describing your shortcomings
That’s another topic that should be avoided on the first date. The desire to be too honest and sincere killed a lot of romances. So let your companion find out about your secret passion for stupid TV shows and pop music a bit later.
Going on the first date, we all fantasize, make plans, and try to predict how our new acquaintance will behave, what will come after the date, etc. But alas, all these plans and predictions are often based on our previous negative experience, fears, and mistakes. And, coming on a date with all this emotional baggage, we sometimes see not a real person but the one we imagined. And communicating with this person, we often think of one thing – how to avoid past mistakes.
The problem is that your new companion can come on a date with the same thoughts. As a result, the fear of disappointment, failure, and pain sometimes completely blocks the way to a new relationship. The only advice we can give here is when getting acquainted with a new person, try to forget about the negative experience you had before and don’t rush things. This principle is called ‘here-and-now.’ Learn to enjoy communication – and your potential relationship will have a future.